原文
A Hard Day in the Kitchen
Shannon Hodge
Everything had gone wrong that morning. The chef had arrived late, severe headache and other effects from drinking too much alcohol, nursing a hangover, and the kitchen hadn’t been cleaned properly the night before, which put him in a worse mood.
The boss, having att ended the same party, was in a similar state. He was holding his head and trying to do the accounts at the same time. Enclosed in his little glass-fronted office, Caroline could see his face growing more puce by the moment. He was just reaching for his first sherry.
Running backwards and forwards between the kitchen and the dining room, Caroline had no time to think for a while.
When she’d first managed to get the waitressing job in the restaurant, she was delighted, for she was at her first year at university and jobs were scarce. She sighed. She’d wondered at the time at her ease in getting employment. It now appeared that her boss’ reputation had preceded him, and no one else had applied. However, she had no time to think of that now. A portly blue-eyed man was giving her furious looks as he waited for his order. Damn! What was it again? She had been caught up with the fussy woman who had been so particular about how her steak was cooked. In fact the offending meal had been sent back to the kitchen twice. It was, the woman complained, too well done—she liked her steak “bleu.” Yuk1! Thought Caroline. Give me a well-done piece of steak every time. The man continued to glower at her while he watched the grey-haired lady’s antics.
Sweetly Caroline went to him and made sure that his order was right. “I wanted,” he enunciated in ringing tones, “just a moderate grill, French fries, and a well-done steak.” He glared dismissively at the woman at the next table. “And a green side salad2.” “Right, sir,” she chirped with a cheer she did not feel. “Coming right up.” With that, she hastily retreated to make sure that Joseph the chef had it right this time.
Yes, thank goodness it was ready. Caroline thought the side salad of lettuce with tomato, several slices of hard-boiled egg, cucumber and dressing looked very attractive.
In her haste, she did not see the young man at a corner table casting her sympathetic glances as he waited patiently. Tall and about 25 with tousled black hair and an impish grin, he was watching “the circus” as he mentally dubbed it.
He could see the pretty young waitress getting more and more frustrated. Poor girl, she looked at the end of her tether. He wondered what he could do to give her a hand and pour oil on troubled waters3.
But all was not over. The man, Henry Savage, had finished his grill with much enjoyment and now turned to his salad. He poised with his knife and fork in mid-air, his expression a study. A green caterpillar was slowly crawling out from under the lettuce. It was large, fat, and apparently well-fed. It paused in its travels to survey the scene. Purple with fury, Henry could barely find his voice.
“Waitress!” he thundered. “Come here this moment!” He sounded every inch the headmaster he was.
“What do you call this?” He pointed with a quivering finger at the caterpillar, which decided the world outside was not as cozy as hiding behind the lettuce leaf and retreated.
Caroline, petrified by the tone of the shout, came into the dining room at a trot.
By now, the whole room had ground to a halt. The diners were all staring at her, mostly in sympathy.
Henry speechlessly gestured at the salad where the caterpillar, bored by its seclusion, had reappeared.
Caroline blanched. Nervously she tried to speak, but failed, then managed, “Sorry, sir, it’s never happened before, we’ll make you a new one.” Grabbing the salad, she whisked it away into the kitchen. But Henry Savage was not to be deterred. After a shouted opinion of what he thought of the restaurant, he stormed out.
Caroline, with a hastily prepared new salad in her hands, returned to an empty table. She didn’t know where to put herself with the rest of the customers peering at her. Bursting into tears, she rushed back to the kitchen. “Take that, you stupid man, next time make sure you wash the salad when you’ve got a hangover,” she ground out to the startled chef. “I’ll give you a tossed salad!” she snarled and threw the contents of the bowl over his head.
The manager, by now completely sober, appeared. When a hasty explanation was made by one of the more lucid customers, he was remarkably nice about the whole episode. Maybe he had a guilty conscience. Caroline mused, remembering that sometimes he was the one who helped wash the lettuce if the staff were too busy. In any event, the whole incident was quickly smoothed over and everyone’s temper restored.
After Caroline had washed her face, tided herself up and resumed working, the young man beckoned her over. “I watched you handle that,” he said admiringly. “I think you did great. That old man really gave you ‘what for4.’ Do you think you could do it all over again for a film I’m producing? It was far better than a custard pie5 any day, you did it so beautifully!” Here he chuckled. “But you really should have thrown it over the old boy’s head: he was being the unreasonable one.”
They looked at each other. Caroline could feel the beginnings of a smile on her face. All of sudden both of them burst out laughing. Maybe it wasn’t going to be such a bad day after all.
（文章选自《散文佳作108篇》，乔萍、翟淑荣、宋洪玮编著，译林出版社，2001，248-253页）
原文注释
1.yuk
Some people say “yuk” when they think something is very unpleasant or disgusting.
2.a side salad
a bowl of salad for one person which is served with a main meal.
3. pour oil on the waters
Meaning: attempt to calm a problematic situation.
Origin: “Troubled” has been used to mean agitated and disturbed, either of mind or in reference to physical elements like water or sky, since at least the 14th century. This phrase alludes to the calming effect of that oil has on wave action as it spreads over the surface of the sea.
4.give sb. what for
to speak angrily to someone whose behaviour you strongly disapprove of
5.a custard pie
The origins of the custard pie as a mechanism for humiliation is unclear. The first on-screen custard pie attack is believed to have taken place in the
1909 silent film Mr Flip.
译文
厨房里的一场闹剧1
何田 译
那天早晨，所有的事都不对劲。厨师来晚了，由于喝酒过多，头痛，还在调理中。前一天晚上厨房没有收拾干净，这使他心情更坏。
曾参加同一个晚会的老板也处于类似的状态中。他一面托着头，一面还试图结账。卡罗琳可以看到他在正面镶有玻璃窗的小办公室里，他的脸那时候变得更加紫了。他在伸手去拿第一瓶雪利酒2。
卡罗琳在厨房和餐厅之间前前后后地奔跑着，没有片刻时间容她思索。
当她首次设法得到餐馆女侍者这一职务时，她很高兴，因为她还在上大学一年级，而工作又很难找到。她叹了一口气。她当时奇怪为什么那么不费力地就找到工作。现在看来，她的老板早已名声在外，因此没有别人申请到他这儿来干。但是，她现在没有时间来考虑这些了。一个胖胖的蓝眼睛的男子正在给她看一副愤怒的脸色，这是他在等着点菜，该死！又是什么？她曾经被那爱挑剔的女人缠住，那女人对于她点的牛排怎么烹调要求很特殊。事实上，这份使那顾客生气的菜也退回厨房两次了。那女人抱怨说，它做得过头了3——她喜欢吃“半生不熟”的牛排4。啐！卡罗琳想，要我吃牛排每次都得熟透过好呢。那个男子一面观察那灰白头发的女人的古怪样子一面继续怒视着卡罗琳。
卡罗琳和颜悦色来到他面前，向他保证点菜不会出什么问题。他毫不含糊地一字一句地说：“我要一份不要太熟也不要太生的烤肉、法国油炸土豆片和一份熟透的牛排5。”他轻蔑地瞪了一眼邻桌那位女人后又说：“还要一份绿色配菜色拉6。”“好的，先生，”卡罗琳细声细气地用一种自己没有察觉到的愉快的口吻说，“马上就来。”随即，匆匆地回到厨房让约瑟夫厨师这次务必要做好。
好，感谢上帝，终于做好了。卡罗琳想，这份用西红柿、几片煮老的鸡蛋、黄瓜和调料搭配的生菜色拉看起来真诱人7。
匆忙中，她没有注意到在角落里那张桌子旁的年轻人在耐心里等待时向她投来的同情的眼光。他是个高个儿，大约25岁，一头蓬乱的黑发，带着一种顽童的笑容注视着这出“杂耍表演”，这是他暗自给眼前这一幕起的绰号。
他可以看出这漂亮的年轻女侍者越来越泄气了。可怜的姑娘，她看来已到了山穷水尽的地步。他不知道他是否能做些什么来帮她一把以平息争端。
但事情还没有了结。那位男子，亨利·萨维奇，相当愉快地吃完了烤肉，又转向他的色拉。忽然，他举着的刀和叉停在了半空中，带着一种钻研的神情看着它。一条绿色蠕虫正慢慢地从生菜下面爬出来，很大，很肥，显然吃得很好。它在旅途中停了下来以观察周围环境，亨利气得脸色发紫，话都差点说不出来8。他吼叫着：“女招待！马上来这儿！”俨然一副十足的校长派头。他用颤抖的手指指那条虫说：“你说这是什么？”这时，这条虫断定外面世界不如藏在生菜叶子后面那么舒服，于是就撤退了。
卡罗琳被那吼叫声吓呆了，赽跌到餐厅。现在整个餐厅都鸦雀无声，用餐者都一个个盯着她看，大多数是带着同情的眼光。
亨利无声地用手势示意那色拉，在那儿，那条虫不甘隐居，又重新出现了。
卡罗琳脸色煞白，想说些什么，但紧张得一时说不出来。后来终于说出：“对不起，先生，这种事以前从来没有发生过。人我们替你另做一份。”她一把抓住那碗色拉，一下子把它端进厨房。但亨利·萨维奇不肯就此罢休。他大喊大嚷地发表了一通他认为餐馆应该是什么样的议论后，就冲出去了。
卡罗琳手里端着仓促做好的新的色拉回到已经没有人的桌子旁。在顾客众目睽睽的情况下，她感到十分尴尬。她哭着跑回了厨房。她冲着受惊吓的厨师以刺耳的嗓音大声嚷：“认错吧，你这傻瓜，下次你要是再酒后头痛，也得一定把生菜洗干净。”“我给你一份拌好的色拉9！”她说着粗暴地把那碗菜扣到他的头上。
经理来了，他此刻完全清醒。当一位头脑比较清楚的顾客匆忙地向他做了一番解释以后，他对于整个事件表现得非常理智。也许他良心上也感到内疚。卡罗琳思索着，想起有时候如果员工们太忙的话，他就是帮助洗生菜的人。无论如何，整个事件很快平息下去了，而每个人又都恢复了平静。
当卡罗琳洗了脸，梳理了一下，又重新工作时，那个年轻人向她招手，要她过去。他表示赞赏地说：“我观察了你处理的这件事。我想你处理得很好。那老家伙确实把你‘整’得够受的。你能考虑为我制作的一部影片再重演一遍刚才发生的事吗？不管怎么说，它比粗俗的打闹喜剧要好得多，你干得真漂亮！”这时他咯咯地笑了起来。“但是你真应该把那碗色拉扣到那老家伙的头上，他当时真不讲道理。”
他们互相对视了一下，卡罗琳开始感到自己脸上有了笑意。突然，他们两人都哈哈大笑起来。也许，这终究不是很坏的一天。
译文赏析
1.这篇散文经常出现在英美文章佳作赏析中，这里我们主要从本文中涉及的饮食文化入手，分析中英文之间的文化翻译。英文题目中的A Bad Day没有被直译为糟糕的一天，而是翻译为一场闹剧。译者通过对全文故事的把握，对题目进行了意译，又在文章的结尾处点题，很显然读者应该对“闹剧”比“糟糕的一天”更感兴趣。
2.“Sherry”指雪利酒。英文中没有量词，因此“first Sherry”被译为第一瓶雪利酒，十分恰当，体现了厨师宿醉未醒的状态。雪利酒是原产自西班牙的一种葡萄酒，十分有名，因此在这里译者并未对其做任何的注释。在西方的酒文化中，葡萄酒是最常见也是最受欢迎的。英文中的wine在不同的情况下有时候泛指所有的酒类，有时候专指葡萄酒。但是中国人普遍喜欢喝粮食酿造的白酒，显然不能直译为white wine（白葡萄酒）。在不同的翻译目的下，大家可以尝试用不同的翻译技巧和策略去解决这个问题。
3.在烹制方法上，中西方式有很大的差异。西方人在饮食方面强调科学与营养，因此烹调的全过程都严格按照科学规范行事，规范化的烹饪要求调料的添加量精确到克，烹调的时间精确到秒，烹调的成熟度精确到几成熟。Well done指全熟，而too well done是说牛排做得比女顾客要求的老了，过火了。
4.“bleu”是一个法语词，即所谓带血的牛肉，表面稍有一点焦黄色泽，这是牛排成熟度最低的一级，因此翻译成“半生不熟”。中国人则很难接受这个成熟度的牛排，一般中国人会点medium或是well done，这和饮食习惯有很大的关系。
5. well done 又一次出现，这里指全熟的牛排，很显然这位男士故意点全熟的牛排，为的是以此来表达对那挑剔妇女的不满，所以翻译时强调为“熟透”的牛排。“moderate”翻译得恰到好处，这个词本来是说很适中的，译者翻译为“不太熟也不太生”很好地解释了在烹调中适中的概念。
6. 色拉是西方人餐桌上必不可少的食物，相对主菜有解腻开胃之用。色拉分很多种类，其中常做的有蔬菜色拉、水果色拉、金枪鱼色拉。译者将“green side salad”直译为绿色配菜色拉，对于中国读者来讲理解起来不直观不清晰。其实这里讲的就是常用绿叶菜制作的蔬菜色拉。
7. 色拉由生菜、黄瓜和西红柿等做成的，此处进一步验证了此色拉为蔬菜色拉，而不是什么绿色色拉。
8. 三个小句子，第一句主语是a green caterpillar，紧接着两个句子都用第三人称代词来替换这个主语，这样符合英文的表达习惯，文章读起来自然流畅。考虑到汉语的表达习惯，译者省略了后面两个句子的主语，句子读起来就不会显得啰嗦，冗繁了。
9. tossed即指摇晃均匀的，又可以指扔这个动作。在原文中其实有一语双关的妙用，而中文的翻译则很难表达出来。
跨文化小贴士
饮食文化
中国人有句古话：“民以食为天。”由此可见饮食在中国文化当中的重要地位。每一个国家或民族都在漫长的历史过程中形成了自己独特的饮食文化，其中包括饮食内容、烹调方法、用餐习惯和宴席礼仪等等。以下对比中国和英美等国的饮食文化。
中国人的饮食内容非常的丰富。不仅包括各种鸡鸭鱼肉，山珍海味，甚至连动物的内脏和皮都可以用来做成各种美味佳肴。而英美国家的人则很少食用动物的内脏。此外，在中国，稍微数一下烹调方法，就有炒、煎、贴、烹、炸、溜、煸、熬、烩、焖、烧、扒、煮、炖、煨、蒸、卤、酱、熏、烤、炝、腌、拌等之多。再加上中国地大物博，形成了很多各具特色的地方饮食体系，如鲁菜、京菜、川菜、浙菜、湘菜、粤菜、徽菜、陕菜、闽菜、东北菜等。
英美等国在饮食内容和烹调方法上都较为简单。早餐breakfast是合成词，由break和fast（斋戒）两个词组成。英美人的早餐通常包括谷类食品、熏肉、烤香肠、煎蛋、牛奶、咖啡和果汁。午餐（lunch或luncheon）因为受到工作的时间和地点的影响也通常比较简单，有时候就是三明治、炸薯片等快餐再加上一杯咖啡。晚餐在英语里有两个词：dinner和supper。Dinner原为正餐，因为英美等国一天之中最为丰富的一餐通常是晚餐，所以用dinner一词来表示晚餐。Supper一词是指较为简单的晚餐。简单些的晚餐通常包括一道汤、一盘色拉、一道主菜和一道甜点。
比起英美等国，中国赋予饮食更多的文化内涵和意义。中国菜在命名上就很有讲究，可以是“两只黄鹂鸣翠柳”、“一行白鹭上青天”的文雅，也可以是“红烧狮子头”、“龙虎斗”、“凤尾虾”的喜庆，更可以追根溯源，如“东坡肉”、“佛跳墙”、“麻婆豆腐”、“夫妻肺片”。这种形象的命名菜式的方法在英美等国是没有的。此外，中国菜的另一个特色是将饮食和中医结合在一起，讲究食疗，在重视味道和营养的同时达到保健的效果。相应的菜式如“虫草全鸭”、“人参莲肉汤”、“莲藕排骨汤”、“当归牛肉羹”等。
中国人使用筷子进餐。筷子古代称为“箸”，已有数千年的历史，雏形是远古人用来夹取食物的树枝和竹棍。英美人进餐使用刀、叉。左手拿叉，右手拿刀。用餐完毕后将刀、叉并排地斜放在盘子里。
在中国，我们可以把碗或盘子拿起来，用筷子拨着吃。而在英美等国，则不允许把碗或盘子拿起来。在中国，如果菜掉到了桌子上，我们一般不再捡起来吃。而在英美等国，则应该把掉在餐桌上的食物捡到盘子里接着吃。此外，在英美等国的餐桌上，吃剩的骨头或渣子不应该放在桌上，而要放在自己盘子的外缘。喝汤的时候不是将盘子由外向里倾斜，而是由里向外倾斜，然后再用汤匙舀着喝。
宴请客人的时候更是体现出文化差异。中国人的宴席上至少要有八道菜（四冷四热）。宴席越大，客人越多、身份越尊贵，菜就会越多。总的讲，饭菜一般都超过主人和客人能够食用的量，以此来显示主人的好客和对客人的尊重。而在英美等国，饭菜的分量以刚好能够吃完或稍有剩余为宜。如果是非正式的聚会，主人可能只提供些饮料、酒以及三明治、炸薯条等一些简单的食物，而不提供饭菜。有时，主人只准备饮料，客人们每人或每家带一样菜，大家一起分享，这种聚餐称为potluck，中文常译做百味餐。
可见，中国和英美等国在饮食内容、烹调方法、用餐习惯和宴席礼仪等方面存在很大的文化差异。了解这些差异有助于消除跨文化交际当中的障碍。
胡文仲.跨文化交际学概论.北京：外语教学与研究出版社，1999.
胡文仲.英美文化辞典.北京：外语教学与研究出版社，1995.
孟继有.英语学习背景知识：美国加拿大.北京：北京大学出版社，2001.
王催春，朱冬碧，吕政.跨文化交际.北京：北京理工大学出版社，2008.
王逢鑫.中国菜命名的文化内涵（The Cultural Implication of the Chinese Cuisine Naming）.跨文化交际面面观.胡文仲，主编.北京：外语教学与研究出版社，1999: 220-233.
杨敏，王克奇，王恒展.中国文化通览.北京：高等教育出版社，2006.
翻译练习
The New Food
Stephen Leacock
I see from the current columns of the daily press that “Professor Plumb, of the University of Chicago, has just invented a highly concentrated form of food. All the essential nutritive elements are put together in the form of pellets, each of which contains from one to two hundred times as much nourishment as an ounce of an ordinary article of diet. These pellets, diluted with water, will form all that is necessary to support life. The professor looks forward confidently to revolutionizing the present food system.”
Now this kind of thing may be all very well in its way, but it is going to have its drawbacks as well. In the bright future anticipated by Professor Plumb, we can easily imagine such incidents as the following:
The smiling family were gathered round the hospitable board. The table was plenteously laid with a soup-plate in front of each beaming child, a bucket of hot water before the radiant mother, and at the head of the board the Christmas dinner of the happy home, warmly covered by a thimble and resting on a poker chip. The expectant whispers of the little ones were hushed as the father, rising from his chair, lifted the thimble and disclosed a small pill of concentrated nourishment on the chip before him. Christmas turkey, cranberry sauce, plum pudding, mince pie—it was all there, all jammed into that little pill and only waiting to expand. Then the father with deep reverence, and a devout eye alternating between the pill and heaven, lifted his voice in a benediction.
At this moment there was an agonized cry from the mother.
“Oh, Henry, quick! Baby has snatched the pill!” It was too true. Dear little Gustavus Adolphus, the golden-haired baby boy, had grabbed the whole Christmas dinner off the poker chip and bolted it. Three hundred and fifty pounds of concentrated nourishment passed down the oesophagus of the unthinking child.
“Clap him on the back!” cried the distracted mother. “Give him water!”
The idea was fatal. The water striking the pill caused it to expand. There was a dull rumbling sound and then, with an awful bang, Gustavus Adolphus exploded into fragments!
And when they gathered the little corpse together, the baby lips were parted in a lingering smile that could only be worn by a child who had eaten thirteen Christmas dinners.
（文章选自《中国翻译》1993年第6期，59页）
参考译文
新式食品
最近我从日报的专栏看到，“芝加哥大学的普拉姆教授刚刚发明了一种高浓缩的食品。这种药丸状食品包含了所有必需的营养成分。每一丸所含营养成分相当于一盎司普通食物的一百到二百倍。经水稀释后，这些丸子将会形成维持生命所需的全部养料。该教授对于彻底改变目前的饮食方式充满了信心。
这种食物本身也许挺不错，但是肯定也会有某些缺陷。从普拉姆教授所期待的光明前景，不难想象可能发生以下情况：
一家人欢乐地围坐在丰盛的餐桌旁。孩子们兴高采烈，面前都放着一个汤盘，母亲精神焕发，面前放着一桶热水；餐桌的一头摆着这个幸福家庭的圣诞晚餐，上面扣着一枚顶针，下面垫着一个扑克牌筹码。父亲站了起来，取下顶针，放在筹码上的一个浓缩着营养物的小药丸便出现在了他面前。充满期待之情的孩子们刚刚还在窃窃私语，现在也安静了下来。圣诞火鸡，越桔甜酱、葡萄干布丁、甜馅饼等——都在这了，都被塞进了这个小小的药丸里，就等着膨胀了。父亲满怀着深深的崇敬之情，虔诚的目光一会儿看着小丸子，一会儿仰视上天，开始大声祷告。
就在这时，母亲发出一声惨叫。
“啊，亨利，快！孩子抓走丸子啦！”果然如此，小宝贝格斯塔弗斯·阿道弗斯，那一头金发的小家伙，已经把整个圣诞大餐从扑克牌筹码上抓进了手中并囫囵吞下。三百五十磅的浓缩营养就这样进入了这个无知的孩子的食道。
“快拍拍他的背！”心急如焚的母亲大喊：“给他水喝!”
这个主意却是致命的。药丸遇到水便急速膨胀。一阵咕噜咕噜的闷响，接着一声可怕的巨响，古斯塔夫斯·阿道弗斯被炸成了碎片！
他们把孩子小小的尸体碎片归拢起来，宝宝的嘴唇，虽然已经离开了身体，却还挂着一丝微笑。这种笑，却是一个吃了13份圣诞晚餐的孩子才会有的笑容。
（译文修改于《中国翻译》1993年第6期，60页；博文 http://blog.163.com/gqq318@126/blog/static/1719828020095125247284）
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